I have been pretty open about my journey with antidepressants. I think it’s important to be open if you’re comfortable with it because a lot of people are intimidated by antidepressants. I posted over a year ago about my journey with them (I’ll link those posts at the end). I’ve tried many different kinds and I’ve tried coming off of them a few times as well each time for a different reason.
I am currently not on an antidepressant. I stopped taking them back in May after weaning myself off. *When you’re considering coming off an antidepressant you should consult with a doctor.* I brought myself slowly down to the lowest dose for a couple of weeks before I came completely off of them, which wasn’t hard because my dose wasn’t that high anyways. If you have a higher dose, it might take a little bit longer because you should be decreasing slowly. You’re doctor will tell you how to do that. I also knew that I would experience withdrawal from my previous experiences. I was prepared and so was my household.
I came off of Prozac in May because I was already on the lowest dose and because I couldn’t sleep well, I was gaining weight and didn’t know why, and I was really curious to see how I would function without them. I was not ashamed about being on antidepressants. I was never ashamed. They helped me stay level through some really tough times. I was just at a point where I was no longer in the place where I was continuously going through traumatic arguments and being treated like my feelings weren’t valid. Basically, I wasn’t in a toxic home environment any more. I felt safer and calmer and I think my previous environment really contributed to the downfall of my mental health.
Since I have been off of them I have had some interesting experiences. My second day off of them completely I was emotional. I knew I would be. For me it’s always the second day that it hits. I was in a car dealer with my boyfriend and I kept fighting the urge to cry. I wasn’t sure why, but I was so irritated with everyone, including myself. It felt silly, but I couldn’t help it. My boyfriend completely understood, but I’m not sure the salesman did…I wasn’t crying in front of him, but I definitely had teary eyes.
I surprisingly didn’t really have any more days like that. It seemed like I adjusted very well. I wasn’t crying over small things and I wasn’t easily irritable like previous experiences. I actually felt a little bit lighter and I was sleeping better. I haven’t noticed a change in my anxiety. I feel like I got to the point where Prozac had no affect on my mental health because I was in a much healthier environment and I was really working on myself inside and outside of therapy. That doesn’t mean I don’t have really horrible anxiety attacks where I don’t want to exist, but at the same time I don’t want to die. I have those occasionally. I just reached a point where antidepressants were no longer assisting me, instead they were just making me tired because I couldn’t sleep.
However, if I feel like I’m in a bad space, and everything I’m trying isn’t working, I would absolutely consider going back onto antidepressants. Sometimes people almost relapse, where they become depressed again after months of not being on an antidepressant.
If you’re apprehensive about antidepressants, I hope this post or my previous posts helped you. You may decide they are absolutely not for you and that’s totally fine. Or you may feel more comfortable about them. If you can take away from my experience, then I’m glad I could help!
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